Broken - But Beautiful

Those that know the dynamics of my family know that it is broken. I am divorced, my oldest child a gloriously wonderful product of that broken marriage. She is so glorious. And she is so wonderful. And I thank God for that marriage, because without it, I would not have her. And although she is becoming more and more "cantankerous," my love for her grows leaps and bounds...everyday.

Someone once told me that they did not know a child that came from a broken home, who was well adjusted. Ouch. That hurt. So, because of my and my ex-husbands problems, my child will be broken forever?

Nope. Don't think so.

Yes, I do worry about her and maybe, I do sometimes overcompensate.

But this child. She is something. 

And God has great plans for her.

My "life coach" and I were talking today, about how scared I get when I'm alone with my girls...because, of course, when I'm alone with them is when something terrible will happen to me, and no one will be there to protect them. They will witness something horrible and then be alone without anyone to care for them for hours. And then they will be scarred for the rest of their lives. (A blog post about my intrusive thoughts will be posted later).

I told my coach about how this person mentioned that sweet girl would never be "quite right." She immediately disagreed. She then began to tell me that it was the broken that make something beautiful. It doesn't matter how you grow up. Whether you have two parents, or step-parents, or one parent, or are a foster child - Jesus uses the difficulties in your life for the good of His will. 

YES.

Beauty from the ashes. I have always believed this, and will continue to look for it in my girls lives. 

My sweet three year old has so much potential. I know that she will fill any void in her life with things that are beautiful and of the Lord. I will teach her to go to Scripture when she feels sadness or fear. I will let her know that God is the One to turn to when she is confused and needs answers. I will do my best to help her with her "worldly" problems, but there are questions that I will not be able to answer and feelings that I will not be able to feel for her. She will have to do it alone, with God. 

Sweet M. will be well adjusted. She will walk out of this phase with the grace that the Lord gave her on that cross. 

We are ALL broken in our own ways. Dirty, yucky, disgusting. But we are also beautiful. Beautiful children of the one who died for us. We are broken - but beautiful.

I can't say it enough - to Him, I am indebted forever.

Humbly His,

L.